Por Uma História Alternativa

Heraclitus of Ephesus, often known as "the Weeping Philosopher," was a pre-Socratic Greek philosopher. He is known for being the father of several major schools of philosophy that would influence Western thought for generations to come, as well as for being a grade-A pussy who would have cried at Kleenex commercials if they had had Kleenex in ancient Greece. Heraclitus's name resembles a cross between "Heraclēs" and "clitoris," a fact which he would sometimes ruminate upon at night as he cried himself to sleep in his cold, cold bed. 

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The Roman Empire is fucking badass, it was most the powerful empire in the world until it was brought down by sexual deviants and the cunted barbarians who attacked Rome repeatedly because they where fucked up beasts who had no intelligence on how important Rome was to the entire world. Rome was the only glory and light of the world, having built the most magificent structures, temples and buildings on the massive scale. Romans invented concrete and the government ideology where democratic processes are used to elect the people who control the empire or country at question. Without the Roman Empire, the world would be a disgraceful and boring place to live today. 100.1% of Italians are known to contain the same blood as the Romans did during the time of Jesus. Only the Roman empire is more fucked up than Japan. 

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Pericles was born on the second of October on November 45th, 495 BC. He was taught by the great philosophers of his age, not including Zeno, Aristotle, or Socrates, the latter of which would later go on to commit suicide by eating a dog.Pericles himself lived a life governed by false virtues and by aspiration. After his frequent failures regarding his attempts to secure himself in a college, he made up his mind to enter the cottage industry. His many rivals, the most famous of which are Herodotus and Pythagoras, conspired to form the Delian League. They would maintain throughout their campaigns against Pericles the fact that he was a stupid, worthless bum.Pericles became ruler of Greece in 475 BC, as whom he made the malevolent contributions to society that we remember today. After exhaustive military campaigning, he was finally defeated by Nietzsche and his uberman army.

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